Despite the horrific Muur-ectomy, de Ronde van Vlaanderen somehow manages to produce a race. I guess monuments have a way of bringing out the best of those racing. As much as I hate the “riders make the race” saying, it definitely was the case in this edition. However, compared to the awesome might and spectacle of the de Muur-Kapelmuur, the current parcours is more a limp handshake than an angry Leeuw van Vlaanderen met raised clenched fist met lightning symbols shooting out of it.

Speaking of awesome might and spectacle, IT’S TIME VOOR GIFS.

Screencap Recap: Ronde van Vlaanderen 2014

Signs you may be racing in Belgium: 1) Cobblestones 2) Narrow roads 3) Lots of fans 4) Drunk fans performing the “OH F**K 2-Hop Dance”

 

Screencap Recap: Ronde van Vlaanderen 2014

Phinney in the break like a baws.

 

Screencap Recap: Ronde van Vlaanderen 2014

Apparently, Bernie Eisel still races. Also, a Professor Man-Q sighting!

 

Screencap Recap: Ronde van Vlaanderen 2014

“What’s my muthaf**king name?” Stijn definitely deserved the Hoogerland award for his Ronde ride.

 

Screencap Recap: Ronde van Vlaanderen 2014

No words, really. Just bike racing in de Vlaanderen.

 

Screencap Recap: Ronde van Vlaanderen 2014

Phinney at de kop, on de Paterberg. #BAWS

 

Screencap Recap: Ronde van Vlaanderen 2014

STIJN. F**KING. DEVOLDER!! After yet *another* date with the tarmac, SD grinds his way back into the peloton passing the (former) God of Thunder.

 

Screencap Recap: Ronde van Vlaanderen 2014

Sweeping shot of swiftly moving peloton is sweeping.

 

Screencap Recap: Ronde van Vlaanderen 2014

Based on how he’s looked, at least physically, I figured Tommeke would figure more. I figured wrong.

 

Screencap Recap: Ronde van Vlaanderen 2014

Ooooo, Greg Van Avermaet makes voor attacking. This is what’s known as animating a race.

 

Screencap Recap: Ronde van Vlaanderen 2014

GVA looking real serious like. A kernel of hope is growing…

 

Screencap Recap: Ronde van Vlaanderen 2014

Yep, they’re still there, Peter. #ALLTHEFAVORITES

 

Screencap Recap: Ronde van Vlaanderen 2014

“We are friends, no? Let’s maket work.”

 

Screencap Recap: Ronde van Vlaanderen 2014

GVA? Moar like GVAGAIN, AMIRITE?

 

Screencap Recap: Ronde van Vlaanderen 2014

Sep Vanmarcke is working wicked hahd on his straight ahead attacks. Next time, Sep.

 

Screencap Recap: Ronde van Vlaanderen 2014

Leading de Ronde up de Oude Kwaremont—not too shabby.

 

Screencap Recap: Ronde van Vlaanderen 2014

Fabian the Vigilant sees things then does things. OPQS, amazingly, have managed to completely f**k themselves. Yes, that *includes* Stijn met GVA.

 

Screencap Recap: Ronde van Vlaanderen 2014

During #Fabsclinic, gaaps are meant to be made.

 

Screencap Recap: Ronde van Vlaanderen 2014

#Fabsclinic met Vanmarcke.

 

Screencap Recap: Ronde van Vlaanderen 2014

Playing an epic game of Kops & Achtervolgers™ on de Paterberg.

 

Screencap Recap: Ronde van Vlaanderen 2014

Sep’s having anger management issues with Stijn’s participation issues.

 

Screencap Recap: Ronde van Vlaanderen 2014

TACTICAL GEL!! Or, TACTICGEL.

 

Screencap Recap: Ronde van Vlaanderen 2014

Fabs and Sep, they dance nice together. Making Vanmarcke, mark.

 

Screencap Recap: Ronde van Vlaanderen 2014

Jump! No, now jum, no, yes?! MAYBEEEEE!!

 

Screencap Recap: Ronde van Vlaanderen 2014

Overwinnings and sads.

 

Screencap Recap: Ronde van Vlaanderen 2014

Fabian Cancellara wint de 2014 Ronde van Vlaanderen!

 

Screencap Recap: Ronde van Vlaanderen 2014

“JAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!” Also apparently, “F**KING C**T!!”

 

Screencap Recap: Ronde van Vlaanderen 2014

#FABSHOWER